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| Ensure your child’s safety | | | Dr. Pragya Khanna | 1/23/2012 10:01:21 PM |
| The words Sexual Harassment usually lead us to depths of despair, even though we keep hearing about different types of cases taking place at usual places almost everyday. But the question is how often do we talk with our preteens and teens about the sexual harassment happening around them?
Sexual harassment is defined as any unwanted behavior that is sexual in nature. This includes, visual, verbal and physical harassment but not limited to, jokes, name-calling, picture-drawing, clothing with sexual suggestions or messages, sexual gestures, talk of sexual acts in the presence of others, spreading rumors of a sexual nature about others, and, of course, unwanted touches or inappropriate touches of the performer on his or her body.
Our children need to understand that these types of unsuitable advances can come from members of the opposite sex or from members of the same sex. With the increasing approval of homosexuality in our society and the proclamation of that approval in the media, same sex harassment is on the rise, though initially it was thought of something that happens to women and girls; however boys are increasingly becoming targets as well.
We need to make it understandable to our youngsters that there is no embarrassment in reporting sexual harassment towards them. If any activity by someone is making them uncomfortable, then it is unwanted, and therefore harassment. Children with high self-esteem are less likely to allow such behavior to put them lower in that social scale than the perpetrator.
It is very much clear that sexual harassment is unlawful and immoral behavior. We need to educate our children that they do not have to take such behavior and moreover they also cannot take part in such behavior towards another.
First of all there should be a good relationship between parents and their children. Whether it is boy or girl, he/she should be in a congenial environment so that they can share their problem with parents. Let your children speak freely about any issue in their life. Make your children aware of the situations and let them be responsive.
There are chances of harassments for girls while traveling in buses, such behavior can be expected while walking on the road, by a peer or even elderly person in school, hostel etc., by a servant or relative at home, or by any unknown person. Most of the times girls keep silent due to the fear of parental agony and this paves the way of encouragement for those who are involved in such deeds. Make sure that your children are bold enough to deal with these kinds of situations.
Never allow your children to stay with strangers. We can expect sex harassment even within the family. So be more careful in this regard as well. Teenage is the age where sexual attraction towards the opposite gender is not unexpected. This is the perfect time to give sex education to your children and it will be effective if they get it from parents.
Moreover, parents need to be cautious keep an eye on the use of Internet by teens. This is a medium where we can connect with the entire world. Though it is a good source of information, nevertheless this same World Wide Web is also proved to become disastrous as well. Online friendship is common nowadays. There are so many cases of cheating, unscrupulous acts, pestering and harassment going through. So your children must be aware of the good and bad side of internet, keep them away from visiting porn sites or reading trash. Never allow them to be an addict of computer or Internet.
This incompatibility between surroundings and the developmental level of a child can cause confusion among young people regarding appropriate limits and sexual expectations. Kids may feel forced into certain behaviors because of what they see around them. Kids are generally exposed to sexually charged images all the time, so they often don’t understand why their behavior is a problem.
Parents must use the language that is clear and concise when you educate children about sexual harassment make them understand the pain, fear and suffering that sexual harassment can cause.
Ask your child’s school about specific policies toward sexual harassment, and the consequences of such behavior. Discuss these consequences with your children, emphasizing the pain and suffering and humiliation that may occur as the result of sexual harassment. Let them know in no vague terms that sexual harassment on school property may lead to suspension or expulsion, and possibly even criminal charges
Look for warning signs that children might be the victim of sexual assault, or even the instigator of such behavior. Generally, children who have been sexually harassed may seem fearful or ashamed of their bodies, while children who do the harassing often seem aggressive or unusually curious about sexual matters.
Kids need to learn how to set sexual boundaries they are at ease with, and to stick to them. Giving varied messages through words and behavior only adds perplexity to what may be an already misty situation. Kids also need to learn to respect boundaries: no means no. Those who intentionally violate these boundaries need to be reported to the right authority. Kids need to know that sexual harassment is against the law, and that stern penalties exist in school and other places.
Parents must teach their kids to be assertive, report the matter immediately to the parent, guardian or teacher, document such happenings, check with other students and file a formal complaint. Be sure your child understands he/she has the right to say no to any kind of touching that is not liked by them.
Let us hope for a Bright future of our Children in this world!
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